To write or not to write—what a silly question for a writer, right? You’d think.
If you’ve kept up with me at all over the last two years, you already know how insane my life has been and how I’ve struggled to work on the manuscripts I started and haven’t finished. I’ve even given myself pep talks on this very blog similar to the one I’m going to give myself today. Maybe this one’ll stick.
Part of my problem is just being unsettled. The house is coming together nicely, but it’s not done yet, and it demands a lot of my attention. And not just that. Big chunks of my time are taken up with the one thing I’m happiest about and love most: family—something that was never an issue when we lived two and a half hours away because we never got to see anyone. So, I’m not about to complain that we get to see them now.
Another part of my problem is that I can’t seem to get into a routine. When MSB was working, I had a routine that involved hours and hours of work time. Now, when I have time in my office, I find myself scrambling to catch up with things other than writing. I wish I could get back into the swing of things.
But it all comes down to this:
I may not have the big blocks of time to write that I used to have, but I do have time. I’ve just been wasting it.
This morning, I again thought of my friends who find time to write against all odds. Kathleen Y’Barbo and Janice Hannah especially amaze me in their ability to make deadlines despite the traumatic events that have occurred in their lives.
Maybe that’s part of my problem. I don’t have deadlines. I don’t have my feet held to the fire where writing is concerned. Meeting contractual obligations for clients isn’t difficult for me, but for the past couple of years, I haven’t been much of a self-motivator where my writing is concerned. This year, I think I’ve written around 1500 words in my work-in-progress. I started it last year, and I’m 8000+ words into it. Since the thing is a novella and not intended to be over 25K words, you’d think I could have finished it in two years.
But this year isn’t over yet. It’s time for me to stop whining, stop wishing I had my old writing schedule and start taking advantage of the time I do have. It’s time for me to move from wish to do.
It’s only 25K words. I’m almost halfway there. If I spend more time writing than belly-aching about it, I bet I could get the first draft done by the end of the month.