For the bulk of the summer, my computer has been running slower than a snail in a headwind, and I don’t know what to blame it on. Sunspots messing with the satellite? Atmospheric debris blocking the signal from HughesNet to my dish? The router? My computer itself?–and if it’s my computer, where would I start to find the problem?
I considered Ascentive Software’s Finally Fast or Mozilla’s Speed Up Your Computer, but got to thinking–yeah, they give you a free analysis of your computer, but since I’m such a techno-idiot that I don’t know where to look for the problem, they could tell me the Man in the Moon stole my “Hurry-It-Up, Mac!” program installed by the “who-knows?” over at Hewlett Packard, and I’d believe them.
Because, frankly, if I don’t know where to look, they could tell me anything just to get me to pay for the services. And if I did know where to look for the problem, I’d probably be able to fix it myself and wouldn’t need them, right?
Today my connection is working amazingly well, as if the cyber-god is giving me a reprieve from smacking my head against the desk. I can’t move fast enough as I race through all the things I need to do online today before that fickle deity plugs up the arteries of my service provider or speckles the sun with more spots or whatever the dickens is going on with this modern torture device.
But, while my connection is behaving, some of the programs–if they’re called “programs”–are going funky. IncrediMail has been sending all my Facebook and ACFW NovelTrack notices directly into the delete file (which I managed to fix for NovelTrack but not for Facebook). YahooMail took forever to download and wouldn’t allow me to send attachments last night. WordPerfect has been taking what seems like an eternity to open, OpenOffice lost an entire file–and neither of these require the internet to function. Neither does the program that burns info onto a CD, but my computer now announces that saving things to disk is “not a function.”
All the while, Norton and HP Health Center are telling me my computer is just hunky-dorey.
And today, I believe them. It’s working great. Maybe the sun shed its spots. Maybe the satellite has a clear shot to my HughesNet dish. Maybe the cyber-gods are just smiling upon me today. Whatever the story, I hope it lasts until my hair grows back out . . .